09 December 2013

A Modest Fucking Proposal

From a status update I saw on the Facebook the other day: "I wonder what men would be like if the porn industry didn't exist."

I think they'd probably be just as clueless.

Apparently, the media is a bigger influence than I like to admit on the thoughts and actions of people.  This isn't a fairly new phenomenon.  I'm sure all kinds of motherfuckers went out and got mop tops when the Beatles came to America.  In fact, my father stated as much because he was a teenager in 1964 when they came over to the states.

Media has been a tool for people to sway opinions probably since time immemorial.

Satirical Media
Sometimes, the intent is not to sway, but the movement becomes an unintended consequence.  So what's the deal with porn?  Apparently, erotic physical displays have been around for a long goddamn time.  One critique we have now is that with it so readily available it can become addictive.

The second (and I think more important point) that I come across in various critiques comes down to the actual display and acting out of the act of sex itself.  A lot of conversational and academic arguments focus on the portrayal of sex as being unrealistic, told from the male actor's POV and generally show a disdain towards women.

Taking all this in, I then thought about what sex actually is.  To quote Tony Blauer, "The Clarity with which you define something determines its usefulness."

So, to boil it down, sex is a biological function.  The reasons behind it are fairly simple and there are a few:

  1. Making babies
  2. Pleasure
  3. Strengthening a pair bond
Joe Quirk talks about these things at length in It's not you, it's Biology. You can even find a lot of this stuff on the discovery channel.  The point is that both males and females can use sex to strengthen a pair bond to keep the other from straying and help keep the species alive.

I think what makes humans a little different than other primates is the fact that we have vivid imaginations, for one.  Given the levels of creativity we possess and our love of fucking, we can think of some outrageous shit.
For instance, this image comes up when you google "Marquis de Sade."
We can also be extreme dicks at times, too.  On the same status I mentioned at the outset, spirituality was brought into play.  The writer of the status said that even "Spiritual" men fall prey to the same thing other men get duped into as well--namely that men expect certain things of women due to the pornographic depiction.

To that end, what the fuck does "Spiritual" mean?  East or West, spiritual and religious traditions are not the most accepting of women.  To liberate yourself from Samsara in Hinduism, one had to live correctly according to their caste, and ascend to the next caste up until they reached the Brahmin caste--which only men could be--and then would they be free of the wheel of life.
Even now, in our progressive era, I went to a service at a Buddhist temple.  My female friends were not allowed to shake the Monks' hands (I could) since they are women.

The writers of the Epistles to Timothy and Titus had several directives regarding the role of Women in the church. Namely, they should shut the fuck up and not assume teaching roles. Now, not everyone follows this sort of nonsense.  I have never met a woman as a pastor, but I assume they do exist (I hope they exist for the growth of the religion) since there was a woman leading a church on King of the Hill.
To me, it seems that a lot of spiritual traditions aren't so innocent, and that the practitioners are victim to the same media influence as others.  Who would have thought.

So what would men be like without porn? Moreover, can we fix what's fucked?

Men would probably still be the same, since other forms of media have taken to hating women long before porn became in vogue.

And the people who grew up with that stuff, raised other people.

The majority of which probably ended up like their fathers and mothers.

I think we can fix it, to a degree. I engage in all sorts of mass media.  I watched and read a A Clockwork Orange when I was eight.  I don't rape, I also don't kill people.  I watch porn.  I make sure my partner is happy when we have sex.  A lot of my friends are the same way.  We realize that each person we encounter is an individual.

They have thoughts, feelings and what not.  So before you encroach upon those, make sure its OK.  Try talking to them to make sure you're on the same page.

If having sex, put their enjoyment at the same level as yours.  Make sure your partner does the same.  If they don't (or if you don't) reevaluate whatever the fuck it is your doing.

The golden rule is probably as old as any other form of mass media out there. It predates Jesus.  It predates Plato.  Possibly for good reason.

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